Author: duskydream
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God
I don’t believe in God. The bible and it’s characters are to me just another collection of Greek Mythology tales. My mother was always letdown by this. She believed her Lord was with her till her last breath. It brought her peace. I appreciate that about religion. No matter how nutty it really is, this…
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FUCK CANCER
I wait. I wait for my dad’s biopsy on his nose that’s clearly skin cancer. The sore gets larger every time we see him. Every trip to the dermatologist, he has little cancers burned off from years of yard work without a shirt or sunscreen. I try not to worry. My step dad has deep…
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My heart beating
My older brother called last week, right before Thanksgiving. He said he’d received a text asking if he’d come pick up a few large items I had requested of my mom’s. The sender of the text is obvious. And my number hasn’t changed. But anyway…. I didn’t cry. I was angry. But, sadness had not…
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Just Another Day Without You
It’s Thanksgiving. But, it’s also just another day I’m living without you. Please guide me. Please continue to help me navigate through life. I need you now more than ever. I will listen, and watch, and remain sensitive to your signs. Sometimes I feel like my world has fallen apart and I will never be…
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Something About A Girl
The magic of a cupcake. The glitter. The sparkle. There’s a softness that’s intangible. Simple. Complicated. Strength concealing a beautiful fragility. Mommy’s best friend. Daddy’s best girl. Reborn. Because of her. You meet you. Your best friend. Lovely. Perfect. Complicated. Your dream. Life with a little girl.
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In my dreams
At 6:15 AM, I was up letting the dogs out. I considered getting up for the day but luckily was able to fall back asleep. I’m now awake again and it’s almost 8 AM. I am reliving this nicest dream of my mom. She’s sick but she’s home. No tubes. No devices. She’s in her…
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In Case Of Emergency
I thought last year was hard! My mom was sick and in the hospital, dying of cancer. I put my step dad down as an emergency contact instead. “Grandfather” box checked under relation to student. This year, he’s no longer my step dad. Right? My mom is dead. He’s getting remarried. So legally, there’s no…
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What It Is
He is going, I have little doubt. He’s not dying. But he fails to exist among us except for in our hopes. With denial, you reach for possible scenarios that might gently explain why. I’m reaching too far and the stretch is beyond painful. I fought my intuition. I ignored the loud and intrusive clues. …
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Summertime
We started out this past school year with my mom in the hospital, dying of cancer. I sent her texts of my 2nd grader on his first day. I never would have thought that those photos would be the last images she would ever see of him. I was rudely reminded of my mother’s…
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Q
This photo was taken at the Art Reflections reception yesterday at Quentin’s school. He didn’t win an award but was recognized for his submission. I encourage him to participate in just about anything that’s available or offered through school, the community, etc. Growing up, my parents worked. And I was the youngest of 5 not…
